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Hi everyone. Happy April.This has been sitting in my in-box for a while and I just had to post it. It’s too funny. See, everyone is so INTO the registered-trademark on their name, it’s like ® and ™ are now part of the vernacular. But it can work against you, as this INSANELY LONG press release proved (I’ve truncated it but left the typos in because they're deserving). And here without further adieux is a press release about Milk Bone Dog Snack, who was trying so hard, to do something nice, but because of that (R) it's all screwed-up, and comical at best….
From: (Some Clueless Person)
Sent: Thursday, March 13, 2008 11:38 AM
Subject: MILK-BONER, AMERICA'S FAVORITE DOG SNACK, DONATES MORE THAN 40,000 POUNDS OF PRODUCT TO FEED THE CHILDREN IN CELEBRATION OF ITS 100TH ANNIVERSARY
______________________________________________________________________
PRESS RELEASE
MILK-BONE®, AMERICA’S FAVORITE DOG SNACK,
Donates MORE THAN 40,000 POUNDS of Product to fEED THE CHILDREN IN CELEBRATION OF ITS 100TH ANNIVERSARY
Milk-Bone® Launches its Make a Milk-Bone MomentTM Contest to Find
100 of the Most Memorable Moments Between Dogs and Their Pet Parents
OKLAHOMA CITY, OK — March 13, 2008 — A century ago, a New York City baker was barking up the right tree when he decided that his four-legged friends deserved a tasty treat too. Originally created in a small bakery on the Lower East Side of Manhattan, the biscuits became known to millions as Milk-Bone® dog biscuits, America’s favorite dog snack. In honor of the brand’s 100th anniversary, Milk-Bone® is treating local shelter dogs to a celebration that is 100 years in the making by donating more than 40,000 pounds of Milk-Bone® dog treats to international hunger relief organization Feed The Children. Del Monte Foods® has been a corporate sponsor to Feed The Children since 1993, donating over 760,000 pounds of products. Feed The Children’s mission is to help children and families who are in need and recognize that dogs are also an important part of the family as well.
Last year, Feed The Children shipped 129 million pounds of food and other essentials to children and families in all 50 states and in 43 foreign countries, supplementing more than 730,000 meals a day worldwide. Since our founding in 1979, Feed The Children has reached out to help children and families in 118 countries around the globe.
“We appreciate all of the dedication and hard work that the Feed The Children does to protect and save our four-legged friends in the local community,” said Amy Hammerschmidt, Milk-Bone®, Senior Brand Manager. “For the last 100 years, Milk-Bone® has been the gold standard for dog snacks. We are thrilled to celebrate this incredible milestone and want to thank the millions of dogs, as well as their pet parents, who make Milk-Bone® dog snacks a special part of their lives. On behalf of the Milk-Bone® brand it is an honor to help this wonderful organization so they can continue in their mission.”
“We appreciate the generosity and support that Milk-Bone® has demonstrated through this product donation,” said Larry Jones, founder and president of Feed The Children. “Milk-Bone is such an iconic brand that our dogs love and we want to thank them for donating more than 40,000 pounds of dog treats. Our organization is dedicated to feeding children and their families, which includes the family dog as well. This donation will go a long way for so many deserving pets.”
For information about making a donation to the Feed The Children, visit www.feedthechildren.org
Nationwide Search for America’s First-Ever Milk-Bone® SpokesDog
In addition to this product donation, to celebrate 100 years (that’s 700 in dog years) of bringing smiles to dogs’ and pet parents’ faces, the Milk-Bone® brand has announced that the iconic dog snack will celebrate millions of Milk-Bone MomentsTM between pooches and their parents in a grand way with the launch of the Make a Milk-Bone MomentTM contest.
Milk-Bone® is looking for dogs and their pet parents to show what it means to have a Milk-Bone Moment™. Almost any dog can do tricks, but in celebration of 100 years, Milk-Bone® is looking for pictures and videos that capture those irreplaceable, special times that you have with your best friend. The contest will recognize the top 100 Milk-Bone Moments™, moments of joy that strengthen the bond between a pet and his or her pet parent — a head on your lap when you are snuggling on the couch together, a little dance when he learns you are taking a walk together, or even a sloppy kiss on the cheek to remind you how much he loves you.
To enter the Make a Milk-Bone MomentTM contest, pet parents are asked to send a favorite video or photo of a special moment with their dog — from the extraordinary to the every day — along with a short essay that explains why the Milk-Bone Moment™, is so meaningful to them.
The top 100 Milk-Bone Moments™ will be posted on www.Milk-Bone.com
11 comments:
Let's put aside the fact that in some countries people eat dogs, as part of a cultural appreciation for the taste, or else, because they ran out of things to eat.
Are these dog treats being donated because they are past the expiration date? It seems like a trend based on prior donations by US companies.
The first thing that came to my mind after reading the headline: "they donated dog biscuits to feed children?"
You know... at least for me, all the (r) and (tm) sins are moot compared to the one of burying the lede. It's way down under, presumably alongside where the baker now resides...
I have tangled with overly aggressive copyright paralegals so many times as to look up have real lawyers help me bust them.
Here's what we hit upon back in the day: conservatively, you only need to defend a trademark once per press release. The best way to do this is to have a disclaimer at bottom of your press release exlaining the marks contained in them i.e. "Milk Bone(R) is a registered trademark of ---" That way it doesn't mess with the content.
That out of the way, this thing is a horrror show for other reasons.
First, WTF is the connection to kids? Are they feeding children dog biscuits? It's the 100th anniversary of a household name brand and this is the best idea that came up with? Puppies and babies are the biggest layups in PR. It's the dogs stupid!
This is also two press releases in one. The charity tie-in and the contest.
And what's up with the insanely long quote from the charity? Way to get *your* message out!
What's the "year of experience" over-under on the person who wrote this release? I'll set the early line at 2.5 ;-)
That said, I will never be able to give my dogs a treat again without cracking up! Thanks Richard!
Sorry to be pedantic, Rochard, but it's 'without further ado', not 'adiuex'. That would mean, 'so, without further goodbyes'...
Anyway, you Americans are crazy with your legals. If we (in Australia) ever have to get a release cleared by a US head office, we know it will get butchered. I might show them this next time it happens!
we are choking - disclaimer should be: "don't read this post during lunch break."
We shared this with our senior paralegal and she's STILL laughing. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you for his.
Sorry to be pedantic, Rochard, but it's 'without further ado', not 'adiuex'. That would mean, 'so, without further goodbyes'...
I was thinking as typing "Why does this feel wrong?" I like the correx. Most people don't bother!
Me on the other hand - I think grammar and stuff like that's fairly urgent. So thanks, Anon.
oops. I meant "thank you for this."
See? It is crucial to be paying attention!
C'mon. They seriously put "boner" instead of "bone" in the e-mail subject line?
They really did, and the best part is--or the worst part--they didn't notice it. It's called "someone else will get my errors before this goes out." Right.
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